I really can’t decide; there’s some built in momentum because OMG MY CHILDHOOD among zoomers and such but it also feels bleak and deflated and is chasing a weary gimmick.
My Nephew’s favorite thing is Minecraft. It seems like the easiest way to make a huge profit is getting the attention of children. They will beg their parents for the treats and the parents will oblige.
who the hell cares? you still watch movies? why?
who the hell cares?
I care, which is the answer to pretty much every “who cares” attempt to silence people for caring.
you still watch movies? why?
I don’t even know what to say about this except earth-salting rhetorical tactics are tiresome and won’t silence me.
i wasnt trying to silence you, i was expressing frustration with movies in general. i’ve just stopped watching them entirely. i sometimes scoff when i hear they’re making yet another remake/sequel instead of something new (passion of christ TWO?!)
anyway, you’re the one who keeps calling this stuff slop (it is slop of course).
Yeah, most of it is slop, and I do sometimes gobble the slop. I eat from the trash can like most of us.

That said, your “who cares” thing was grating to me because clearly enough people cared here to comment otherwise.
Its gonna make over a billion dollars. Why? idk but its gonna happen
I’m leaning on “it’s absolute slop for younger slop hogs” and by sheer volume of young slop hogs to the trough it may score that billion.
They’re definitely going for a quantity versus quality approach here.
A Five Nights At Freddy’s movie would probably make bank.
I thought there already was one?
I didn’t know, if that’s the case.
There was and I think it bombed
There was also a Nic Cage movie that seemed like it started with a FNaF spec script
It did just shy of $300 million in the theaters. No where near Barbie, Mario, or Oppenheimer, but also only had a $20 million budget so the return on investment was decent.
I think it won’t be much of a commercial success, but won’t flop either. The public is too slop-worn for another soulless kids’ movie to be as big as Mario so soon after, but it still has enough going for it that I can’t see it failing Morbius style.
It’ll do alright, I’m sure it will turn a profit, but it’s gonna make nowhere near Mario movie numbers. So it’ll live in that weird space where it’s not a flop but does well under the expectations the studio had for “tie-in movie for the most popular video game.”
the midpoint between mario and borderlands, perhaps
Mario’s been around longer and has that many more people with nostalgia for it. Minecraft appeals to a much smaller percentage of old farts
What world are you living in where you think the target market for the minecraft movie is old farts? Approximately 80% of kids aged 6-15 play or played minecraft
It’s not, but the studios want their sweet “four quadrant” hits
I feel like my kiddo is a solid barometer for what will hit the pop culture.
His take on the Minecraft movie is he doesn’t like the way they screwed up the scale, the crafting, and the weird animation/live action hybrid…but he’s still super excited for it.
I think it will be a decent hit, turn a profit…then completely evaporate and leave no lasting cultural impact.
I think it’ll make a profit but barely, but just making a profit is not seen as success in current-day Hollywood.
I agree with everyone’s assessment it will probably be profitable (ranging from slim to hugely) and have no cultural impact most likely.
I do think there is a slim golden path like possibility where it’s actually bizarrely fun and ends up a camp classic, against all expectations.
Kind of like every “remember this thing from your childhood? DAE think nostaligia so good?!” movie that has come out in the last decade. They’re always the safest they can possibly be, focus tested into being as unchallenging and inoffensive as possible so they are an “enjoyable” experience that moviegoers forget 5 minutes after seeing it.
It will make a decent amount of money and leave no cultural impact
Sort of like the bazinga-flavored wet fart that was the Ready Player One movie?
I’ll take it.
God that movie was so fucking disappointing. The book was soooo good and the movie straight up left one of the main characters out of the plot entirely. What the fuck were they thinking.
The book was soooo good
I have so much I could say about that but I’ll try not to yuck your yum instead.

The kids will love it I’m sure. The adults? I’m highly skeptical.
Def flop.
Flop
i mean i thought marioslop would flop too and people still gaslit themselves into thinking it was a good movie so idk at this point. still probably, like, team ‘minecraft will flop’ purely because i feel like i haven’t seen anyone sincerely say they thought the trailers were good but at the same time it’s possible enough people just watch it regardless it succeeds.
I don’t think there is any possible way that it’s actually good, but whether that translates to success or failure is a different question that I don’t have any answer to.
Probably mild success. Less than Mario and FNAF but still profitable



















